To Mr. R.

You told your
8th grade class one time,
Your piece or peace of mind...
That you enjoyed Asian history because
"Armies of people who look the SAME
were fighting over land and stuff."
Huh.

Armies of people who look the same.

So can I write you an essay
Displaying the trivialities between
The Blue and the Grey, lying so serene
On blood-stained green grass
As brother fought against brother
Never wondering what they meant to each other...
Because they were
Armies of people who look the same?

So may I write you a love song
Demeaning the virtues and vices,
The literary devices never touching
on Montague or Capulet,
Because Romeo & Juliet
Were from families
who looked the same?

So tell me why
You thought it was fine,
That it was okay
To talk about armies that all looked the same.
To tell young minds
Who might actually mind
And have been told
"You all look the same."
...Why did you think it was okay?

I remember only
Hot flush and swallowed words,
Anger, hoping I hadn't heard
A teacher, a teacher
Say it so clear
Saying it, saying it near,

"Armies of people who all looked the same."

You were a good teacher,
You still are, I know.
You joined for the right reasons,
To teach and grow generations
& I remember you joined after 9/11
To break stereotypes, to investigate hype.

You were a good teacher,
So you probably know
I can't figure out why
You settled to say,
That one fine day,

That vicious, ugly thing.

"Armies of people who all looked the same."

"Peace begins with you and me."

A September Goodbye

Goodbye  like the sun also rises,
Goodbye like apple pies
            and banana pancakes,
That dessert, lasts on your tongue goodbye.
That "hate to leave you" goodbye.

You are my sister before misters,
The sweet sarcastic smile to my
Too cynical comments.
I will miss your humor
like Sunday morning coffee,
that caffeine kick.

You are the plaid to my tweed,
Patterend differently but yet
Sewn just the same,
You help me remember my name,
              a sister thread.

And while you're away
Doing as the Romans do,
I'll remember what it's like to stay
In a home with slow-droning fans
With a friend, with a sister
Who taught me how to smile again
When pain taught me tears.

I will miss you,
So give me a
Goodbye  like the sun also rises,
Goodbye like apple pies
             and banana pancakes,
That dessert, lasts on your tongue goodbye.
That "I'll see you soon" goodbye.

Now. Then. Always.

Now.

Stop thinking of him now.

Like warm coffee, warm sink, warm hands,

Stop.

Cold coffee, cold sink, cold hands,

He's in love with the idea of himself.

And you love him.

And now you must learn to leave

warm jackets, warm hands, warm glances

and live with his

empty jackets, empty hands, empty glances.

Stop loving him.

Stop.

Then.

He was thinking of you then.

Like new beginnings, new laughter, new grins.

He was.

Dead endings, deadpan silence, dead grimace.

The silence space he left in his wake,

But he's still here.

But now you must learn to grieve

New mornings, new girls, new flings

and know they become his

Done mornings, done girls, done flings.

He was yours once.

Once.

Always.

He never promised you always.

Like golden rings, golden years or gold lining.

Never promises.

Broken rings, broken years, broken lining.

Your desire led you to him,

And your spirit dragged you back.

And now you must learn to relieve

Choked hopes, choked promises and choked dreams

and resurrect your faith in

fresh hopes, fresh promises and fresh dreams.

Seek your new Always.

Seek.

Nesting

Hollow and shallow reigned my name,
Taunts that remembered only shame
And echoes reached across my chest,
The girl forever lost in restlessness,
The bane of her own wandering.

"I will not wait for the dead,
Or wake the swine up from his bed,
I will walk where the living tread,"
Said the girl lost in wandering
The going and gone in her steps.

Her lips, my lips, just pondering.

Love stayed once, a while,
Stroked my cheek, so soft and mild
But he left and brought instead
The waking horror, the walking dead.

He was not Love but merely Lust,
Mustered in silent, ancient rust,
"We must," said he, in thundering,
"Test the waters and churn the sea,
Turn the tide into the lee,
And I will wait for only thee,
For thee."

Yet he left me, lofty high
Heart strewn in streamers across the sky
Lust only knows to tear apart
The sordid and forlorn lost heart.
Silence led me to my knees,
Beckoning with broken pleas
To rid the hidden hollow in my heart,
The abyss of pestilential emptiness.
"I dare not stay awake for this,
For this."

Love came not on gaudy wings
Or far-flung empty, fairy dreams.
He came as whisper, as soothing voice,
A smile, so tender, a gentle choice:
"Choose me and hollowness will fair,
Like dust, open to the air
And I will nestle in your chest,
No longer the sting of emptiness,
But passion like a fiery flame,
And you will no longer remember shame.
And you will know Love's true name,
You will know my true name."

And so I sit here by and by, nesting
Love so bright, nestled nearby
In a once vacant, empty lot,
That silent, unkind, bandaged spot
That Lust so damaged, that one so cruel
who called me only "damned" and "fool"
But Love decided to save.
He calls me by another name,
"Beloved" and "Blessed,
Take comfort and rest
For I have always known your name."
And so Love hopes and dreams and stays,
Walks and laughs and eats and plays,

And so Love stays.