It's 2 in the morning
& I am mourning the shape your body makes,
faking nose dives into the bed and sheets billowing like sails,
flailing and failing, calling and falling
to the waves our bodies create,
precipitating the beats of new found love,
this unfounded faith in who we were and what we did,
the small fib we told ourselves, wrapped ourselves in
fine linen only to begin again,
my love.
You are one and you are many.
The sea anemone secrets of my screwed apart heart,
like the jagged shatterings and smatterings on a sea floor,
calling with an appalling shriek into the night air,
I miss the smell of your hair
and the way your eyelids fluttered in the dark,
the shuttering of your backbone when fingertips rest,
to bless the undersides of hands and smooth upper lips,
I miss you.
The ticking of the clock
reminds me of your unwinding laugh,
that hiccupy cacaphony that found me in corners and rooftops,
ceilings and hot spots, I remember your tin roof smile
telling me to stay awhile
in places and spaces I should never have gone to,
you're wrong in all the right places
and I don't want to be right,
flight seems so close and quick, the candle wick burning
too bright...too bright tonight.
Bedroom eyes see, hypnotize in the dark
we embark.
Don't worry, I'm in a hurry
to forget you
put you in a pocket or locket and
set aside you
mind you I'm not missing
the parts I've found missing...
just listlessly, miserably missing you,
the you's I left behind,
one fine day
in the middle of the night
kept the memory, lost the fight.
Remember me in pocket times
when your eyes are adjusting to the light
and you can't remember what melancholy tastes like
or the sun plays melodies on your wristband,
you'll reach for my hand
and realize
I'm gone.
